As I enter the last 40 days of my high school life, I have come to the sad realisation that I am never going to make out with Heath Ledger circa 1999. Here is a list of other things that never happened during high school:
1. I would attend a party that was as crazy as Bogey Lowenstein’s.
Bogey Lowenstein: The name given to all good party hosts since 1999
I had thought that, upon turning the ripe old age of thirteen and attending high school, I make an automatic transition into spending my weekends at out-of-control parties, getting utterly wasted and hooking up with strange boys. In fact, the only party I attended in during year eight was to celebrate the thirteenth birthday of my friend Ashleigh. Her mum treated us to facials made out of yoghurt and avocado while we talked about music exams and what lollies we were going to eat.
2. Some insanely handsome Romeo-type would sweep me off my feet and we would stay together forever.
Could not have been further from the truth. I NEVER HAD A HIGH SCHOOL BOYFRIEND.
I recently found a diary that I had written when I was eleven. Inside was a series of deadlines for the upcoming years. To name a few:
First Kiss/Boyfriend – 12 years old
First Looong Relationship – 14 years old (lasts until the end of high school)
I apologise to my 11-year-old self. I hadn’t done so much as kiss a boy until the age of sixteen, and I can tell you that it did not end in a relationship. This was, in part, due to the kissing incident, but I digress. Eleven year old self, READ: YOU WON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND, BUT THIS IS NOT A TRAGEDY. Far from it. I had – and still have – a heap of wonderful friends of the male and female variety, but I just didn’t feel like getting inside any of their pants.
3. There would be cliques, and cliques everywhere. I would ultimately chose one to become a part of.
There were different circles of friends, but we never had a Queen Bee. I say this somewhat sadly, although I know I should be celebrating the fact that Regina George did not attend my school. Maybe this is because our school is small, but within my group o’ pals alone, we have a cool Asian, a smattering of Varsity Jocks and four of us are band geeks. I am one of the band geeks, and you can probably tell (judging by the point made in realisation 2) that I am not of the overly sexually active variety. Together, I think they make up some of the Greatest People You Will Ever Meet.
So far, high school has been incredible. After reading this, you might think that I am some sad excuse for a teenager, but I promise that I will get around to showing you that I have done some cool(ish) things during high school. But that’s for another post.